I Now Pronounce You "MORONS"

I've you're looking for a great movie to see, then I can say only this about "I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry"... don't bother. Look for something more fulfilling, like having a root canal done, because this was a stupid, pointless and God awful movie.

I hate to say that about something Kevin James is in. I think "King of Queens" is a good television show, and I like Kevin's standup routines. But he must have had his Big Mac spiked when he signed on for this half-assed dud of a film - I can't even say half-assed dud of a comedy, because a comedy is an implication that the film itself is able to inspire laughs through clevor use of humor - not because of how pathetic it is. If you want to hear laughter, you can see this movie, but it'll be followed with lines from the audience like "I can't believe we can't get a refund for this" and "this is great, MUCH better than the tranfusion that would save my life. I want to see a movie about two firemen who are so obviously NOT like real firemen that the credibility of the movie was taxed to its limit in the first 5 minutes.

And while we're at pointing out some problems, let's bring up the even more serious issue with the movie:



Adam Sandler was in it. My problem with it? He's not really all that funny. I don't want to sound prejudiced here, so let me assure you I'm not. HAS ANYONE NOTICED THAT HE HAS TO WORK A JEW JOKE INTO EVERY FILM HE'S IN AT A RATE OF 1 JOKE FOR EVERY 15 MINUTES THAT THE FILM IS GOING ON?

I'm sorry, I think we've all gotten the point, Adam. Yes, we know you're Jewish. Why is it that you needed to add in a line like "Do you promise to where a Yamaka?" It wasn't funny. To be honest, it wasn't necessary. You already had made a comment regarding your ethnic and religious background in this movie just 15 seconds earlier. As I said, it's not a problem with being Jewish, it's a problem with him needing to insert that fact onto the screen like it is supposed to make more of a difference.

You notice, he didn't do it when he had an actual good movie, like Wedding Singer. He didn't need to do it much at all for SNL. Maybe, just maybe, if he actually focused on a good movie script with the writers he works with, he could come up with some lines that didn't make me say "Oh yeah, Adam probably wrote this part, too".

So in the end (ha ha) there's only three thing that made this movie worth seeing for me (as a guy - probably for a lot of women this wouldn't matter):





Yeah... that's it.

So basically, my own position is that this movie could have been better in a lot of ways.

Out of 5 stars, I give it a half star. That's it. Basically to make the movie better, this is how the movie should have started out.



And maybe they could have added a subline like "Thank you for giving us $4.00 for this movie - we won't make you have to waste any more resources like your time by watching this travesty."

Now it's worth 5 stars.