Hi everybody!!!
HI DR GRE... wait, wrong show.
Ok, tonight, in the interest of promoting the amazing work of others and inspiring reader participation (and so I can stop having to do so much bloody work myself) I am now accepting articles for posting to the Vortex from you the reader. In other words, I don't want to do my job as often so I'll have you all do it part of the time. Sit back and enjoy the first sampling of work from guest writer Scott O'Dell.
TEN THINGS THAT PEOPLE SAY THAT PISS ME OFF
(and you thought I was easily pissed off)
1) Do these jeans make me look fat? (Who the hell cares? Wear the damn jeans and get over it already!)
2) Boy I was so trashed last night. (Oh, so it was you that puked in the bathroom. CLEAN IT UP, WILL YOU?)
3) She's not upset. She'd just having her period. (First of all, I didn't need the information; second of all, why tell me? Am I supposed to relate to that somehow?)
4) I love watching wrestling. (Yet if your old lady spent all day watching soap operas all day, you'd get pissed, wouldn't you? Why don't you watch a REAL sport for a change).
5) We need peace in our time. (Get over it, is isn't going to happen. Since Cain killed Abel there has been war, you'd better get used to it.)
6) We need to save our enviornment. (OK, so none of us wants a dirty planet, all right? But nobody, least of all America, is willing to give up all of our consumerism. Deal with it.)
7) I just cannot quit smoking. (This is a bunch of crap. You just don't WANT to quit smoking. Wait until you're dying of lung cancer and then tell me you can't quit... oh wait, by then it will be too late, LOSER!)
8) You really should lose some weight. (You really should MIND YOUR OWN DAMN BUSINESS, SCREW YOU!)
9) I am not angry with you. (Oh, this one's a beauty. What, so you think I'm such an idiot that I can't see that pissed off look on your face?)
10) I think that we should just be friends. (Oh, so that was your decision, huh? So I guess what I feel doesn't count at all, huh? Why do members of the opposite sex insult us with this one?)
So there you have it. The ten most stupidest phrases anyone can say to me. They aren't in an order; so don't think you can get away with saying something ot me just because it's lower or higher on the list. They're ALL stupid.
-You know, Scott... you're my hero. :) Have a good night everyone.
HI DR GRE... wait, wrong show.
Ok, tonight, in the interest of promoting the amazing work of others and inspiring reader participation (and so I can stop having to do so much bloody work myself) I am now accepting articles for posting to the Vortex from you the reader. In other words, I don't want to do my job as often so I'll have you all do it part of the time. Sit back and enjoy the first sampling of work from guest writer Scott O'Dell.
TEN THINGS THAT PEOPLE SAY THAT PISS ME OFF
(and you thought I was easily pissed off)
1) Do these jeans make me look fat? (Who the hell cares? Wear the damn jeans and get over it already!)
2) Boy I was so trashed last night. (Oh, so it was you that puked in the bathroom. CLEAN IT UP, WILL YOU?)
3) She's not upset. She'd just having her period. (First of all, I didn't need the information; second of all, why tell me? Am I supposed to relate to that somehow?)
4) I love watching wrestling. (Yet if your old lady spent all day watching soap operas all day, you'd get pissed, wouldn't you? Why don't you watch a REAL sport for a change).
5) We need peace in our time. (Get over it, is isn't going to happen. Since Cain killed Abel there has been war, you'd better get used to it.)
6) We need to save our enviornment. (OK, so none of us wants a dirty planet, all right? But nobody, least of all America, is willing to give up all of our consumerism. Deal with it.)
7) I just cannot quit smoking. (This is a bunch of crap. You just don't WANT to quit smoking. Wait until you're dying of lung cancer and then tell me you can't quit... oh wait, by then it will be too late, LOSER!)
8) You really should lose some weight. (You really should MIND YOUR OWN DAMN BUSINESS, SCREW YOU!)
9) I am not angry with you. (Oh, this one's a beauty. What, so you think I'm such an idiot that I can't see that pissed off look on your face?)
10) I think that we should just be friends. (Oh, so that was your decision, huh? So I guess what I feel doesn't count at all, huh? Why do members of the opposite sex insult us with this one?)
So there you have it. The ten most stupidest phrases anyone can say to me. They aren't in an order; so don't think you can get away with saying something ot me just because it's lower or higher on the list. They're ALL stupid.
-You know, Scott... you're my hero. :) Have a good night everyone.
